Review: 'Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile' is for kids; Javier Bardem is a gift for everyone

SALT LAKE CITY (KUTV) — Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile
3 out of 5 Stars
Director: Josh Gordon, Will Speck
Writers: Will Davies, Bernard Waber
Starring: Constance Wu, Javier Bardem, Scoot McNairy
Genre: Action, Comedy, Musical
Rated: PG for mild peril and thematic elements

Studio Synopsis: When the Primm family (Constance Wu, Scoot McNairy, Winslow Fegley) moves to New York City, their young son Josh struggles to adapt to his new school and new friends. All of that changes when he discovers Lyle - a singing crocodile (Shawn Mendes) who loves baths, caviar and great music-living in the attic of his new home. The two become fast friends, but when Lyle’s existence is threatened by evil neighbor Mr. Grumps (Brett Gelman), the Primms must band together with Lyle’s charismatic owner, Hector P. Valenti (Javier Bardem), to show the world that family can come from the most unexpected places and there’s nothing wrong with a big singing crocodile with an even bigger personality.

Review: 2022 has been an incredibly strange year. We’ve had subtitled rocks, an adorable shell (with shoes on) spouting life-changing observations, a hallucinatory Viking epic, a witch tale for the ages, and bonkers Marvel horror. And now we have Javier Bardem offering up a performance that is so enjoyable, it makes a pedestrian children’s film into a movie that everyone needs to see.

Well, there are also the songs written by Benj Pasek and Justin Paul that sound very much like “The Greatest Showman” (they wrote the songs in “The Greatest Showman”) with Zac Efron replaced by a digital crocodile with the voice of Shawn Mendes. It’s absurd.

“Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile” is based on a book by Bernard Waber. It was published in 1965. I’d never heard of it. This is odd because it's exactly the kind of book I would have loved as a child. In fact, there are aspects of the story that mirror my sixth-grade experience. The only difference was the home we moved into didn’t have a singing crocodile and I spent the better part of an entire summer alone in an unfamiliar house in a completely foreign neighborhood. My adventures were completely imaginary solo missions.

But it’s not the “new kid” aspect of the story that makes this adaptation noteworthy. It’s Bardem’s performance as Hector P. Valenti, a magician desperately trying to remain relevant in a world that has grown tired of his tricks. Hector stumbles upon a tiny singing crocodile in an exotic animal store. He names the crocodile Lyle and sketches out a future where he and Lyle take the world by storm. The problem being Lyle has stage fright and those dreams are quickly replaced by debts that Hector can’t pay.

So, Hector hits the road on his own and leaves Lyle to live without any means of survival. This forces Lyle to hide in the attic by day and dumpster dive for food by night. And then the Primm family moves into Hector’s home with their son Josh who panics over every aspect of his life. The smallest danger becomes a major threat. It’s a story that has been told numerous times by a variety of writers and lived by more children than anyone would like to believe.

Still, the scenes without Hector and Bardem’s frantic dancing and singing, aren’t as engaging or as entertaining. Maybe Josh and Lyle become friends too quickly. Josh’s ability to set aside his nervousness happens almost instantly. Too quickly by my judgment.

To keep the narrative moving Lyle sings a variety of classic and new songs. It’s something like a jukebox musical. There’s a story, but it's really about getting to the next needle drop. And when Hector reappears the movie gets the boost it needs to dance its way to the credits.

It’s a shame that Hector wasn’t there the whole time.